Dr. Travis Bradberry is considered an expert in Emotional Intelligence (EQ) and he proposes these “9 Habits of Highly Emotionally Intelligent People”.
1-They’re relentlessly positive– emotionally intelligent people don’t get caught up in things they can’t control. They are capable of identifying negative thought patterns and focus their energy on two things they can control- attention and effort.
2-They have a robust emotional vocabulary– those with high EQ’s know how to identify and verbalize their emotions. Additionally, they understand the difference between degrees of emotions and can use the correct word to communicate them.
3-They’re assertive- these individuals are able to establish a balance between having empathy and compassion while setting limits and boundaries with others. They do not default to passive aggressive or avoidant methods of dealing with conflict.
4-They’re curious about other people- they take a genuine interest in others which is a product of their capacity for empathy.
5-They forgive but they don’t forget- while knowing that holding resentment and grudges is unhealthy, high EQ people know how to let go of these emotions yet learn from these mistakes and are careful not to set themselves up in the future. Fool me once…shame on you. Fool me twice…shame on me.
6-They won’t let anyone limit their joy- they avoid making comparisons between themselves and others. Self worth comes from within and they live according to their opinion of self.
7-They make things fun- high EQ people know how to own their choices and see the positive and enjoyment in this. They know how to make themselves happy and get enjoyment out of life.
8-They are difficult to offend- they are self-confident and open minded. They are able to take criticism in stride and see the value in the opinions of others for self improvement.
9-They squash negative self-talk- the more you ruminate on negative thoughts, the more power you give them. They know negative thoughts are not facts but distortions pieces of reality.
Unlike IQ, EQ is malleable and can be changed. With practice and effort, you can change and raise your EQ to be a healthier and happier person. Commit yourself to a process of change…you’re worth it!